Sore Spot... HIT!

Husband and his parents took a field trip the city today - to do a bit of sight seeing so I took the opportunity to have some quality time with my children and catch up with some family. Thought I'd be the good wife and ensured I was home once they returned. Wanted them to think I was slaving over the stove all afternoon if only those damn left overs hadn't given it away. We sat down to have a very late lunch and MIL tells me she saw the building I use to work in. I mean it wouldn't be hard to miss, its a landmark - I use to work there :). She prodded a few more questions and finished by asking me if I would like to return to work. I thought about it for a minute and I just couldn't respond. I had this lump in my throat. What the? I was getting all worked up about it. I just shook my head and pretended there was something in my eye. I started to feel a little sad. Was I sad because I want to go back to the crazy part of Sydney with all the hustle and bustle? Did I really want my old job back?  Did I miss the people I work with? Was I just craving that me time? I am not quite sure what it was but I had to snap out of it very quickly. Am I going to respond like this every time someone mentions Telstra?

For the rest of the afternoon I continued to think about why I got so worked up. I don't really want to leave the house at 6.30am every day, get the children ready for school/childcare, pretend to like people that you really couldn't stomach, come home after a big day and have to cook, clean and prepare for the next day. So what is it..........?  Y'all might laugh when I tell you, but it is a hard adaptation.. I know my children/family need me but it's kinda different. Don't laugh but "It is my need to succeed!!" I need to feel like I have accomplished something daily - more of a personal achievement. You know? Closed a huge sale, change a process, launch a new product?!! 

I had to collect myself this afternoon and put everything back into perspective.. I am a pretty cool mum & pretty good at this SAH stuff (self confirmed) so decided I will set some time aside (tomorrow night) and set some personal goals that Ima gonna achieve!! I have a few in mind, but just need to pencil them and set a date.. If I am game enough, might even share them with you all. Some might be small, others right up there.... Watch this space!

Funny though, husband and I were havin' a chat this evening and he told me that he wants to go and complete another Masters degree. I thought great, if thats what you want. Then his finishing comment was, "yeh and as I will be working, you will have to complete my assignments for me. You did say you wanted mental stimulation right?"... Here I was thinking, he never listens to me!!!

So, today was the first time I felt someone really hit the 'sore spot'. No doubt overtime it will heal....

Mx